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Budget Pr0n!

Hi pr0nsters.  If there’s anything your blogger loves more than a sale, it’s a challenge.  Today I will be combining the two.  In this (first) edition of Dirt Cheap Pr0n, I will be putting together three pr0nish looks for $100-150.  Everyone knows the Fifth Rule of Shopping Pr0n:  A true pr0nista doesn’t depend on price.  You rarely have to pay full price, loveys.

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A sale is a tricky thing; you want the best price, but you don’t want the item to sell out in your size, particularly if you’re in the 10-14 range, which generally sells first.  So choose wisely – decide what an item of clothing is worth to you, sign up for email lists at favorite stores so you’ll get advance notice of sales, and special discounts, and when the time is right – pounce!  Sometimes that time is right away.  But rarely.


Outfit #1 is a work/date/dinner outfit..

I’m going to start with this fuchsia silk cami on final sale over at J. Crew.  It’s a final sale, so you have to know how this particular brand fits you, but I like it because it’s versatile – wear it under a suit, or with jeans or a pencil skirt.  They have it available in most sizes, and it’s in ivory, too.

The cami is fully lined, with a side zipper and it’s machine washable.  So this gets a thumbs up for me for $29.99, originally $75.00.

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Right now I’m thinking that I don’t like final sales – scary.  So I’m going to pair this with a classic pencil skirt on sale at Martin & Osa .

Because the cami has a slight A-Line I want something more fitted on bottom to balance it out.  This pencil skirt can go from work to evening, I like the above the knee length, and the slight sheen.

The skirt has a little stretch in it, and it’s fully lined.  Martin & Osa has free shipping and returns, and the skirt is still available in sizes 6-18.  So this skirt is a winner for only $19.99 on clearance from $69.99, and I’ve only spent half my budget.  Whoo!

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I’m kind of flexible with how I can finish the outfit on top depending on how much money I have left, but I know I need shoes so that’s what I’m after next.  

Endless.com has free overnight shipping on regular priced shoes, but these are clearance, so it’s standard shipping, which is 3-5 business days.  Still – free! Loving these cute Bongo peep toe Thora pumps for$26.10.

Thora has a 3.5 inch heel with a .25 inch platform, peep toe, and is available in sizes 6 to 8.5.  I can still spend $24.00 or so on accessories or a jacket if I’m really lucky.

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Overstock.com has $1.00 shipping, so I’m going to take advantage of that.  For $9.89 this pink ring matches the pink top, and will give the outfit another splash of color.

Finally I’m going to brighten the whole thing with a Sterling Silver Polished Flex Bangle Bracelet for $15.29.

Grand total, including shipping with J. Crew equals $110.76. *beams*  Throw in your own handbag and black tights, pls.

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Outfit #2 is an outfit that can be casual, work or date.  Almost anywhere.

I don’t know why finding an affordable, pr0nish dress was so difficult, but trust me: it was.  I found the dress I chose in an unlikely place: The Greenloop.  This is an organic cotton wrap dress; you may have heard that wrap dresses are nearly universally flattering, and it’s true.  Whether you’ve got a tummy or hips, a wrap dress can camouflage.

Again, this is organic cotton, with a deep v-neck (throw a cami under if there’s too much cleavage), 3/4 length sleeves, and an a-line skirt that hits right above the knee (too long? the tailor is your friend).  It’s available up to an XL (16) in Black, Cranberry, Midnight Blue and Truffle (shown).

Diane was originally $95, it’s on sale for $75; use code sale25 and the final price is $61.75 (including $5.00 shipping). It’s a simple dress, but that just means you can do a lot with it.

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I love it with boots, but thinking outside the box, I went over to Payless.  They’re following Target’s lead and teaming up with high fashion designers to produce pr0nish Payless lines.

These gray flats are Lela Rose for Target. Your dear blogger is all over gray tights right now, too. They go with everything and are such a cute change from black.  The flats $34, so this outfit is going to be more than the last.

Speaking of Target, while we’re running errands, we’ll swing into there.  Hayden-Harnett has a limited edition line there, and I’ll be darned if I’m going to miss out on that!

The website seems to feel this is a rectangular clutch with no straps; I beg to differ.  This is a brown rectangular PVC bag, with a fold-over flap (don’t know if the interior zips or not), with a square gold-tone detail on the front and a skinny strap.

The interior has the Hayden Harnett signature.

You can have your own Hayden Harnett for $29.99 (the clutch is $19.99).  We’re up to $125, so let’s throw in one more thing and call it a wrap.

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In fact, that’s a great idea.  I’m going to throw on this purple ruffle-knit acrylic wrap.  It’ll keep me warm and give the outfit a little contrast color, which will go with any of the colors the dress is in, and give a little contrast texture.  It’s $14.99 on clearance.

Our grand total is about $140, and we got a dress, shoes, handbag and a wrap.  Not shabby!  If we’d used our own shoes, and bought the clutch, we’d come in right at $100.

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Outfit #3 is for men, and I’m anticipating this is going to be easy.

Men, I’m going to teach you a very valuable skill: it’s called layering.  A few years ago, Scowley’s hubby came down for the weekend and I cleaned him up but good.  This is the kind of outfit we’re going to put together.

Here’s what you do: you take a button down shirt with a little personality, like this Project E pale green distressed ‘Rivington’ button down shirt from Bluefly.com.  Retail price: $84.99, Bluefly price $50, reduced to $44.99, Presidents Day sale price: $35.99.

Now you pair it with a nice t-shirt underneath.  A nice t-shirt.  A new t-shirt.  With some color and personality.  I like this coffee colored graphic-tee, also from Pr0ject E.  Yes, the top is green and the bottom is brown.  You can do that.  When in doubt, buy a color wheel.

(Okay, I’m being stereotypical here.  My guy friends are actually pretty hot and dress well.)  The t-shirt was blah blah, it’s now $16.79 when all is said and done.

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Whee.  We’re only up to about 5o bucks.  We need jeans.  I have to impress on both men and women that jeans shopping sucks.  You may have to try on more than one pair.  You may have to try on lots of pairs.  Suck it up.

Don’t overthink jeans.  Head over to Old Navy, and pick yourself up a pair of medium/dark rinse boot-cut jeans for $29.50.  (I know, I just contradicted myself, but for the sake of this post, my point is that jeans don’t need to cost $200.)

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We’re up to $80, and we need shoes.  I’m partial to a nice “sneaker” like this navy nylon “Kamikaze” from Gola at Bluefly.

As long as they’re not actual sneakers, and they’re neat and clean, you’re golden.

These are $39.99.  Bluefly shipping within the continental U.S. is a flat $7.95, bringing our fine gentleman’s grand total to $130.22.

Once you’ve got this type of dressing down, call your blogger! (Have I mentioned I’m single?)

There you have it!  Three complete outfits, which will stretch very far in your closet for under $150.  Yay!

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This was a pain in the butt, but the thing is that good sales are usually much easier to find in person.  Stores like Loehmann’s, TJMaxx, Marshalls and Filene’s Basement will save you money on good name brands right off the bat.  Sign up for their email lists, find out about sales, and get coupons via email and save even more!

Dress like a million bucks for just a hundred.  Now that’s pr0n. Thanks for reading, lumpkins.  I’m a bit under the weather, so I hope it was up to par.

As always, it was good for me; tell me, was it good for you?

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Pr0n Plus – February 8th Edition

Hello hello, my lovely pr0n potatoes.  Those of you who are pr0n virgins – welcome!  Those of you with a pr0n habit – welcome back!  In this week’s edition of Pr0n Plus: The Very Best Plus Size Fashion, some of the things I’ll be showing you a classic trenchcoat up to a size 18, adorable, soft cotton/spandex lingerie from Kiyonna up to a size 30-32, and the cutest pumps you’ve ever seen, up to a size 16M from Kathryn Kerrigan.  Time’s a-wasting and other people are buying our stuff, my little plumquats, so let’s dig in!

I think I’ll start with my biggest surprise, which was finding out that designer MaxStudio.com sells a size XL, which appears to be a U.S. size 16-18. Since they have lovely clothes and even lovelier sales, this was quite a find.  This is a 100% cashmere short sleeved dress, with bib detail, and ruffles at the sleeve and hem.  Wear it on its own, or with a pair of yummy tights.

In charcoal and heather yellow (love these colors), it’s available up to an XL, heather rust is available up to an L, which is a 14/16.  The size chart looks pretty true to me, but do look for yourself.  I almost forgot – it was originally $228, and it’s now $168 ($100 total gets you free shipping).  Did I mention it’s 100% cashmere?.  They’re out of it in your dear blogger’s size; I checked. :( (MaxStudio.com garments appear to be made in a variety of mostly Asian countries: China, Hong Kong (which is now part of China), and Singapore, from what I can find)

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This sort of clingy dress calls for a smooth line.  ShoppingPr0nistas are big fans of Gok Wan‘s plus size lingerie and shapewear.  His Divine Outline would work wonderfully under this dress. £45 or about $67 USD, sizes 8 to 32.

If you’re someplace they don’t deliver to  (i.e. the U.S.), make friends with someone in the U.K. and bake them cookies.  Or bug me and I’ll see what I can do.  I can’t see where his line is made, but I’ll poke Char who works over there and see if she’ll tell me.  Oh! And his new collection is coming out February 23rd!  Eeee!  Watch this space.  Well, not this space, but this space.

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Moving on, munchkins!  That less dress was a tad unforgiving – definitely meant for an hourglass figure.  This next dress, Kilo by PAS, is more forgiving of someone less hourglass and more apple.

It’s hard to see, but this is actually a cream dress with a black heart print (best view here), 97% viscose (like a rayon), 3% spandex with gathering under the bust and sleeve – perhaps for a bit of stretch.  The dress measures 37″ from shoulder to hem – figure accordingly where it’s going to hit on you.  This is so so sexy, and so chic, I had to feature it.

It’s a prime example of the Third Rule of Shopping Pr0n: Good fashion is good fashion at any size.  Over at PinkMarzipan.com, they do appear to ship outside the UK, and they’re selling this dress for £75 or about $110USD.  They have a currency converter onsite, which is nice.  Unfortunately, I can’t find any information about where PAS clothing is made.

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A great dress demands a great pair of shoes, no – deserves it!  Over at My Lovely Big Feet Blog, where girlfriend knows good shoes, I had seen these scrumptious shoes in blue.  But where she had them linked to,  you couldn’t order them after 2/1/09.  Lucky for you, my pr0n readers, I ran across them at Endless.com.

Pick up Kathryn Kerrigan’s Ames T-straps up to a size 16 M, on sale for $149.40.  These are leather and patent leather, with an adjustable T-strap, and a 2 1/4 curved wedge heel.  Both the outsole and the insole are leather.

Kathryn Kerrigan shoes are handcrafted in Spain, and this particular style is also available in black.  The rest of her line is equally unique and stylish.  Ch-ch-check it out.

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If you don’t necessarily need big, but you do need wide surf over to old standby Nordstrom and try Söfft’s Chrissy pump. Söfft is what we call truth in advertising.  They’re known as a “comfort” brand, so to get styling like this from a comfort brand is genius.

I have to tell you that I have personally tried on these shoes.  They’re 3.5″ heels, which is about 1/2″ higher than your dear pr0n blogger can handle (Yes, I’m a shoe hypocrite.).  So I put these on (and they were comfortable – don’t get me wrong!)  and I was like a Weeble – because “Weebles wobble, but they don’t fall down”.  That was me. :D

Anyhoo.  Chrissy is lovely, also available in black leather, from sizes 7-10 Narrow, 5-12 Medium and 1-10 Wide, and has a cushy polyurethane sole.  They’re only $99 smackeroos at Nordy’s. The company is based in Massachusetts, but the shoes appear to be made in China.

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So you’ve got the great dress, you’re rocking the fabulous shoes, what every fashionista needs in her closet next is a trenchcoat.

From Martin & Osa, a U.S. brand from the same family as American Eagle Outfitters, is this classic styled soft polyester trenchcoat.  Here’s what the site has to say: Fitted silhouette, removable self-belt, double-breasted metal-button placket, rounded collar, hook-and-eye closure,  long sleeves with belts, front pockets, and vented button-tab hem falls above knee.  Whew.

Here’s what I say: this is a great jacket and you’ll have it for years.  Buy it.  Ha.  Martin & Osa do ship internationally.  It goes up to an XXL, which they say is an 18; the measurements look a little small to me, but it’s been a while since I’ve been plus-size so check it out for yourself.  The coat is a new arrival and $170 (with free shipping). Country of origin is tricky to pin down other than “Imported”.  American Eagle Outfitters says that at least 20% of their denim comes from China, so you can assume there’s at least a chance this was made there.

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Something that I always had the hardest time finding when I was plus-size was chic work clothes: clothing my mother wouldn’t wear (sorry, Pr0nMom!), that I could feel cute in, working in a more business-like environment.

So my eyes bugged out at this Patrizia Tailored Ruffle Jacket and Skirt from Igigi.comI’m a little unhappy because it’s a man-made herringbone tweed, as opposed to say a wool, or wool blend tweed; for the money ($208 for the jacket and $102 for the pants) it should be natural fibers, IMO.

But that being said, it’s a terrific design (your blogger wants one!)  The jacket has princess seams (in fact you can see the exact structure of the jacket at the website, which I’ve never seen at a website before), bracelet length sleeves, and stretch.

The pants have a slight bootcut, a contoured waistband (to hopefully avoid that “gap” in back) with belt loops (seriously pants without belt loops drive me insane); they’re fully lined, and they’re cuffed, which you can always have taken down if you don’t like cuffs.  In theory, both go up to a size 30, but sizes are already sold out or selling fast. Thanks, igigi!  Both pieces were manufactured in the United States.

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Last but not least, I bring you comfy, sexy lingerie.  I bring you comfy, sexy lingerie up to a size 30/32!  (How much do you love me?)  Well known line Kiyonna, now has a separate lingerie line, Alectra by Kiyonna.  It’s great to see a range of stuff in a range of sizes.

This is a cami, lounge pants (lounge pants are out of a lot of sizes) and thong in cotton candy with black lace or black with taupe lace.  All pieces in this set are 97% cotton & 3% spandex.

The cami is $26, and goes from an 0X (10-12) to a 3X (22-24) in the cotton candy, and 4X (26-28) in the black.  The lounge pants are $26, and available 0X & 1X in Cotton Candy and 0X to 2X in Black. (International shipping available)

These do sell elsewhere, so look around if they’re out of your size.  The thong is $18, and available up to a 5x (30-32) in both colors.  I have nothing on manufacturing for Alectra; Kiyonna simply says “Imported”.

Well my little starfish, our time together is up.  I do include plus-size clothing in all my posts, but Pr0n Plus, our alone time, comes each weekend.  I save my weekends for you my little plus size pr0ners, because you’re special.

I have no idea what my next post is going to be…but it’ll be something!  Tuesday, perhaps.  Until then, it was good for me; tell me, was it good for you?

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